The following are fallacies: that there exists a love willing to give as selflessly in return as your heart can give; that love trumps all; that love is real when it doesn’t hurt.
Love, as we feel it, is only real when it hurts because you find you can give so much of yourself, perhaps even more than you intend (and if you didn’t intend to give your all, I’d counter you weren’t really so loving), and still come up shorted of truth and honesty reciprocated. Excepting amongst maybe some familial relationships, there is no limitless, unconditional, honest love between people as we have been taught to imagine it. There is only the people with whom you choose to be vulnerable and a measure of patience in how much you will take from each other. “Love” is the daily conscious decision to stick it out, which may or may not happen as long as you hope or with the benefits or consistent joy or even unbroken trust for which you hoped. And, more often than not, with the way our society – and our/my generation especially – seems to be wired, this daily decision-making will not last long in the grand scheme of things
There is no such thing as the love we dream of, that poets and screenwriters break our hearts and hopes on. It is but a rumour sent to distract us from finding ourselves by looking for love with others, a love that cannot exist. We can only ever be good enough for and truly unconditionally and forever loved by ourselves, and until then, we are not loved, because no one else can give that in the traditional definition that we use.
Seek to find yourself and fall in love then. It’s the only lasting relationship you can indefinitely count on.